Secondary Trauma
by Writer With Sprite
Summary: Eagle discovers Fan Fiction and discovers his inability to discover reality from fiction in the same day. Oneshot.


K-Unit discovers FanFiction.

## break ##

It was one of those times when they had a short bit of time off and actually could get together and talk. The time when they had access to Internet, for once. They were at Snake's apartment, waiting to be shipped out on their next mission. While Wolf, Fox, and Snake were all grateful for the break, Eagle was bored, understandably, and he was online, trolling the internet, looking for something to do.

Bored, he spent half an hour researching his code name. He loved birds, so even though the Eagle wasn't his favorite bird, he was content with his nickname. It was better than Double-O-Nothing. Or Cub. Smirking at the thought, he wondered what the runt had been up too.

He went to his favorite search website – Google – (he really didn't know how anyone could stand anything else) – and he searched 'Double O Nothing', 'Cub,' and 'K-Unit' all in the same sentence. With the way he'd treated the kid, he knew that there would be some crap about him online.

Much to his surprise, he came on a website called 'fan - fiction dot net. "Looks promising," he muttered, wondering if Cub had created the website out of an act of revenge. He frowned as he looked at the link title. Why was it called _Alex__Rider_fanfiction? Were people _fans_of this kid?

Oh, God, what had K-Unit done? What if Wolf was right, and he really was someone famous, and…

Rolling his eyes at some of the summaries, Eagle decided to be brave and flip to the 'M' section. He didn't know what M was for, but it looked interesting. He winced as he looked through some of the threads, reading through a few.

This group had to have been Cub's doing, he thought. They were calling him _Alex__Rider_. Maybe that was his real name. If he wanted to believe the stories, it appeared that the kid's parents were dead. He was living with his uncle, who had died.

He had been sent to K-Unit to train for a mission.

Impossible, Eagle thought. The kid was fourteen. There was no way in hell SAS would send him on a mission.

Reading through the works, though, he became more and more convinced. Everyone was in agreement.

Damn, now he felt bad for making that joke that the kid's parents died… and then his uncle…

…and then Jack, who he couldn't decide if she was a boy or a girl…

Wait. This story was saying Alex _was_a girl. What the hell?

He was horribly shocked at some of the romance stories. People were saying that Wolf was in _love_ with Cub. He knew that wasn't true, Cub wasn't in love with Wolf. Wolf was in love with a girl named… Stacy. Yeah. Stacy.

That was her name, right?

"Crazy people!" he muttered out loud. There were multiple authors. How many people had Cub _told_about K-Unit? They had to track the kid down, now. Wolf was going to be so pissed. He wasn't too happy, either.

Then he stumbled on the story where it said that he had had sexual relationships with Snake.

He barley made it halfway through before he stumbled over to the toilet, vomiting. That was when Snake and Wolf came home.

"Hey, Eagle, are you alright?" Snake asked, coming over and finding him on the bathroom.

"No, I've been traumatized for life! Cub is really going on secret missions, and his parents are really dead, and I can't decide whether his guardian Jack is a guy or a girl, and – and – they think WolfisdatingCub-"

"What the _hell_?" Wolf barked, lunging for Eagle. Fox appeared seemingly out of nowhere and held him back.

"You have stalkers online. They think you're sleeping with Cub. They also seem to think Fox is sleeping with Cub. Apparently, you guys didn't tell me _a__lot_ while he was at Breacon Beacons. And, apparently, the kid gets around a lot."

"I'm not going out with Cub! I swear to God, when I get my hands on that kid, I'm going to castrate his…"

"Wolf, child friendly," Snake interrupted. "What made you vomit, Eagle?"

"They think I'm sleeping with you, and I'm not!" Eagle wailed as he pointed to the computer screen.

Wolf pulled over the screen and read it, skimming over some parts. "Eagle, in this one it says he's living in our apartment. He is _not_ living in our apartment. I also know you aren't having any sexual relationships with Snake, you're not having any sexual relationships at all."

"I think I know what you're talking about. Is that the website where they also have Alex as a girl and Alan Blunt – the MI6 head – and the Mi6 second-head sleeping together?"

"Didn't get that far, but yeah, they had that in a few places."

Wolf put the computer down on the table and promptly smacked Eagle on the head. "Dude, it's _fan-fiction_. The brat is famous and has a FanFiction website online. Let them think what they want to think… it's all false."

"Oh, good," Eagle said with a relieved sigh. "I was beginning to think that Alex Rider was a girl."

….Meanwhile, at Tom's house….

"Did you just hear someone scream Eagle really, really loud?" Tom asked Alex.

"Yeah, I could have sworn I heard that, too. Odd."

"You don't think they discovered the fanfiction website we set up to get back at them, did you?"

"Nah. Not a chance. None of them know how to use the computer."

FINISHED


End file.
